38 Total Quotes

John Cleese Quotes

John Cleese
If you want creative workers, give them enough time to play.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to understand before one of us dies
John Cleese
#Conversation

John Cleese
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Wine is wonderful stuff. But so many people are put off by the snobbery of it.
John Cleese
#People #English Actor

John Cleese
It is absolutely impossible to get even a majority of us together in a room, and I'm not joking. It just happens very, very seldom -- every three years or something.
John Cleese
#Majority

John Cleese
It's exactly the same territory, and it's a complete coincidence.
John Cleese
#Coincidence

John Cleese
The really good idea is always traceable back quite a long way, often to a not very good idea which sparked off another idea that was only slightly better, which somebody else misunderstood in such a way that they then said something which was really rather interesting.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
A man will give up almost anything except his suffering.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
He who laughs most, learns best.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Still trying to run a hotel and getting it wrong,
John Cleese
#Trying

John Cleese
I started to make harder jokes before anyone else did. And the producers would get anxious. They'd say, 'That's a little bit hard-edged, isn't it?' And I'd say, 'Let's just try it and see how the audience reacts. If they don't like it, let's cut it out.' And the audience roared with laughter, so I learned you could do this harder humor and people loved it.
John Cleese
#Jokes

John Cleese
Don't let anyone tell you what you ought to like, ... Some wines that some experts think are absolutely exquisite don't appeal to me at all.
John Cleese
#Experts

John Cleese
I used to desire many, many things, but now I have just one desire, and that's to get rid of all my other desires
John Cleese
#Desire

John Cleese
If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.
John Cleese
#English Actor #Laughter

John Cleese
The one thing I remember about Christmas was that my father used to take me out in a boat about ten miles offshore on Christmas Day, and I used to have to swim back. Extraordinary. It was a ritual. Mind you, that wasn't the hard part. The difficult bit was getting out of the sack.
John Cleese
#Christmas

John Cleese
You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Come to me. I want to plow you like a Calgary driveway at Christmas.
John Cleese
#Christmas

John Cleese
Who's ever going to write a film in which I get the girl? Me!
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
The trouble with the British is that they are not interested in ideas. If Jesus came back today and offered to speak for an hour on British television, they would say, "What! Another talking head?"
John Cleese
#Jesus Christ

John Cleese
It seems astounding to me now that the video games are perhaps as important as the movie themselves. And people will spend 2 or 3 years obsessing about the video game in exactly the same way that they'd be obsessing about the movie if they were working on that.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that we have no competence with.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
Don't let anyone tell you what you ought to like... Some wines that some experts think are absolutely exquisite don't appeal to me at all.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very narrow concept of what God can be, and it was damn close to an old man with a beard.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
God was treated like this powerful, erratic, rather punitive father who has to be pacified and praised. You know, flattered.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
I can never do better than Fawlty Towers whatever I do. Now I very much want to teach young talent some rules of the game.
John Cleese
#English Actor

John Cleese
I tend to have an odd split in my mind: I tend to look at it as a writer and when the writing thing is OK and I'm happy with it, then I put on my actor's hat.
John Cleese
#English Actor