21 Total Quotes

Gilbert Gottfried Quotes

Not paying the comics a dime -- that's Penn's greatest magic trick,
Gilbert Gottfried
#Magic

I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.
Gilbert Gottfried
#Funny #American Comedian

I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

I host these bad movies late at night.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

Unfortunately, I've never been mistaken as Johnny Depp.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny

Well, I'm eventually gonna take the Daryl Hannah parts.
Gilbert Gottfried
#American Comedian #Funny