A Canterbury Tale

(27 votes)   Chaucer: Look, I have a gambling problem. I can't help myself. And these people will - quite literally - take off clothes of your back.
William: What are you expecting us to do about it?
Peter The Pardoner of Rouen: He assured us that you, his liege, would pay us.
William: And who are you?
Peter The Pardoner of Rouen: Peter, a humble pardoner and purveyor of religious relics.
William: How much does he owe you?
Simon The Summoner of Rouen: Ten gold florins.
William: What would you do to him, if I was to refuse?
Simon The Summoner of Rouen: We, on behalf of the Lord God, would take him of his flesh, so that he may understand that gambling is a sin.


A Knights Tale 2001

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(21 votes)   Great Grandmother and Babble: I've only seen two dogs, both at a distance.
Lugsy: You see, Bean?
Bean: I am not Bean, I'm a nasty old owl and I'm going to get you.
[charges at Lugsy but Great Grandmother gets in the way]
Great Grandmother and Babble: Now Bean, you don't have to pretend to be a nasty old owl, why? Because you're a little bunny, at least that's what you are on the outside. Get it?


The Tale of the Bunny Picnic (TV) 1986

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(17 votes)   William: I can't explain it. She makes me feel like a poet.
Roland: Well you may feel like a poet, but you sound like an idiot. You don't even know her name.


A Knights Tale 2001

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(16 votes)   Crazy Joe: [stops closing credits] Hey! Hey, you see this guy here?
[taps crew member name]
Crazy Joe: He hardly worked on the film at all! Always on the phone - yakking, yakking, yakking!


Shark Tale 2004

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(15 votes)   Bunny: [after Grandpa Bean tells the story of the bunny picnic and the dog and the farmer] But Grandpa Bean, what about the bunny picnic?
Bean: Oh well I'm glad you asked, because there's never been another bunny picnic like it, before or since.


The Tale of the Bunny Picnic (TV) 1986

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(15 votes)   [Watching William practice jousting]
Wat: I think he's getting worse.
Roland: He is getting worse.


A Knights Tale 2001

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(12 votes)   Pecos Bill: Don't lose the dream!


Tall Tale 1995

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(12 votes)   Pecos Bill: I ain't apologizin' to no ox!


Tall Tale 1995

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(11 votes)   Oscar: He trips underwater. Now who in the halibut trips underwater? And by the way, on what?


Shark Tale 2004

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(11 votes)   Pecos Bill: I ought to plug you two right now, but I make it a rule never to kill a man on Sunday.
Zeb: Today's Wednesday.


Tall Tale 1995

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(11 votes)   Pecos Bill: We came to say goodbye, Daniel.
Daniel Hackett: I knew you would.


Tall Tale 1995

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(11 votes)   William: This is a disaster.
Roland: [staring at the tent material] Nah, I think it'll tunic up quite nicely.


A Knights Tale 2001

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(10 votes)   Stepmother: It's just Cinderella. She's nothing but a nothing.
Prince Henry: As they say, madam, it takes one to know one.


Faerie Tale Theatre 1982

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(10 votes)   [Keeping beat for a dance lesson]
Chaucer: And one and two and three and four and your hands should be light like a birdie on a branch. And one and two and three and four and Wat doesn't lead he follows like a girl.
[Wat punches him. Scene changes, and Chaucer now has a tissue stuck up one nostril]
Chaucer: And one and two and twirlie twirlie twirlie! And one and two and you're still getting it wrong! And one and two and three and four you can hit me all day cause you punch like a... what?
Roland: A girl!


A Knights Tale 2001

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(8 votes)   Jocelyn: Damn your pride, William. It is you and only you that will not see you run.
William: My pride is the only thing that they can't take from me.
Jocelyn: They can take it away from you, they can and they will. Oh, they will. But love they cannot take.


A Knights Tale 2001

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